Which way does this top go? Where’s the sleeve? This shirt is so twisted up! Crisscrossed in the front and the back. Bet you thought I was describing Jerry, huh. NOT! I was trying to find out how to get into this old Vera Wang tee shirt that I have. (Yes, Vera does have tee shirts on the clearance rack sometimes.) I mean why can’t I just wear a simple tee shirt today? Ya know, a small hole for the neck and two arms across from each other with a BIG hole to on the bottom to pull it over my body. We stress ourselves out over the stupidest things. Cell phones, answering machines, fancy smancy hi-tech ovens, even TEE SHIRTS! No wonder we’re all going mad!
Speaking of mad. Things are definitely changing with Jerry. I’ve noticed that he gets pouty and miffed whenever I get preoccupied with anything other than HIM. Yesterday, we had the best day. I took him to a few appointments; we chatted with all my clients, and then had a great little early dinner in Beaufort. (Beaufort is this adorable little fishing village with lots of cool boats and little seafood dives.) I ordered his favorite shrimp burger and onion rings. I cut his sandwich and place both of his hands on one half so it wouldn’t fall apart. He was happy. We walked around a little bit and looked at the boats, then headed home.
Once we were home, I turned on the news for him; then I walked across the room to the kitchen table and started to dabble with some new watercolor pencils I’ve discovered. My girlfriend, Ann, unexpectedly popped in the door a few minutes later. I loved that! Visitors always brighten my day. So excited about my new pencils, we both started working on some small drawings.
My girlfriends always make a big “ta do” over Jerry. They give him tons of hugs and call him their boyfriend, yada yada yada. But this time, I could tell Jerry was NOT happy about my having company. After his brief cordials, he went upstairs in a pouty little mood. Ann was all concerned and didn’t want Jerry to be upset, so I went up to check on him. Jerry was all curled up on the bed, in a fetal position with his eyes just staring into space. After a futile attempt to get him to come back down, I straightened him out, sat him up, turned on some TV sports, then went back down to visit Ann.
Now, in the past I would have been covered in guilt but I’ve slowly come to grips with that. Not feeling guilty, that is. I’ve had to realize that this is NOT Jerry, it’s the disease. Besides, he won’t remember being mad in the morning. Neither will I.